Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
