I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
