I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
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