Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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