ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
