i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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