Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
