I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Ladies don't puke and tell
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
