I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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