so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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