I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Randomize
