so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Randomize
