Who did Billy Mays play for?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
you made out with another girl for some wings
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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