I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
