She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
