"it" just moved
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize