Sponge bath it is.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
