too bad you live with your parents still
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize