We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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