I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
