my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
