Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
We smell like vodka and hangover
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