Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
