Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize