Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize