Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
