it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
