OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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