Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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