So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
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