Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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