Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
