it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
