If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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