I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
