I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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