No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
