honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
