I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
