Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize