..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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