You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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