what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
