Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
