This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
