try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
