me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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