She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
the day after is always just damage control
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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