my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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