On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Randomize
